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lyrics

i am cold for the first time in a week and i finally left my room to find a pink sky
light almost gone and the mosquitoes finally died at least i hope
at the very least they’ve stopped biting me so its finally safe to sit out here

for the last year i’ve felt like if i could just find the right place if i could just get the right stuff and have the right routine i wouldn’t have to worry about ever feeling down
but i forgot to account for the fact that happiness isn’t a permanent state
it’s a fleeting sensation just temporary elation something you experience for a little while

there is no puzzle to solve to unlock it once and for all
i guess that’s more like complacency
so maybe i should think more about gratification because it’s implicit that it’s the result of an action
not a passive ‘wake up and look at my accumulated shit’ and experience happiness

but the word really doesn’t matter it’s the same feeling we’re all after
i just want to not always have to drag myself out of bed
• to spring to my feet each day and move with intention
to mostly feel good and be motivated

so i’m learning what helps me is to always be busy
not like “sorry i can’t see you ‘cause i’m busy”
but like i’m seeing you right now and that makes me busy. 

credits

from Significant Weather, released April 21, 2017

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Lauren Records California

Since 2011

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